Man, this thread devolved from a humorous back and forth, to what appears to be something akin to a highschool lunchroom dick measuring contest.
Regarding beards: I had just enlisted when the Navy decided beards were no longer allowed. The reason, then as well as now, was related to the gas mask. In reality, I strongly suspected it was because there were far too many of the ZZ Top/Duck Dynasty types around and the Navy was trying to clean up its image of the drunken sailor. The gas mask issue was just the lipstick on that pig.