I totally agree that there is no way competitions are going to be able to use only actual pieces of cover, as cover. I was saying that to illustrate that even a well-intentioned tactical prescription like 'must use cover', still incorporates fundamental elements of unreality and has to be taken with the requisite grain of salt. That Frank Glover guy sounds like an awesome match designer. I would like to shoot some loaves with my nine.
I bet it would be a real pain to see how many Ding Dongs it would really take - my money is on the bullet curving/veering out of the line of Ding Dongs before it had reached its full penetration potential. Obviously, I would wear a wig. You are correct. Or a hat. Or the shutter glasses. The possibilities are endless.
For now, my mini-mart cover calculus stands at:
Hostess endcap = concealment
Flats of 2-liter sodas = might be cover, depending, but with lots of gaps