You will get many answers. I prefer 25 yards. The problem is that a lot of people can't shoot accurately enough and their equipment isn't accurate enough to get a solid zero at 25. 10 yards is a lot more doable for many so that is often given as a practice. A 10 yard zero where you shoot a very tight group and get a good zero is better than an attempt at 25 where you get lost in the turrets chasing marksmanship and/or equipment problems.
When I'm working with a new optic on a new gun I'll shoot the sights, then move the optic to start out sitting on top of the front sight post at 10. Then I'll refine that at 25. (Dots are smaller than irons and so need to be zeroed with a little more refinement) The end result is that I can hit squirrels in the vitals at 60+ yards with the pistol when I'm done...assuming I do my part. I do have to factor a little bit of offset at very close ranges (5 yards and in) to hit very precise targets, but that's more about the height of the optic itself than anything else. And that will be a little bit different on every setup.
If you struggle at 25, get it dialed in at 10 and then test it at 25. It will probably be fine.
Don't forget to consider your bullet weight. If you zero with 115 grain 9mm ball, you may find that 147 grain duty ammo shoots very differently, especially at extended distance. And vice versa. Generally in my guns I've not found that 115 grain 9mm ball shoots to a different point of aim than 124 grain HST +P, or at least not to a point of aim that's different enough where I can notice a problem.
Generally, yes. A 5 yard zero might really suck if you are trying to hit something at extended distance because there's still some offset to worry about with most slide-mounted optic setups. How often is that a practical consideration? Rarely outside of the range environment or hunting. Handguns aren't shooting the same sorts of ballistic arcs as rifles and so their sights are set up differently. Even so, if you zero where that little bit of mechanical offset is a factor it can bite you pretty bad back at 25 and beyond.Is far better than near?
If you can shoot at extended distances (50 or 100 yards) by all means do so and see what your zero does out at those ranges. You'll probably be able to keep rounds on a typical target silhouette out at those distances with a 10 yard zero. I've seen some gun/optic combos where a 10 yard zero was way the hell off at extended distances, but relatively few and I suspect there was some user error mixed in there as well.
EDIT - This is true of iron sights as well...different sight setups often have different implications on how you hold the sights that are invisible on typical targets but show up when you are chasing 10 rings at 25 or 1" squares at 5 yards. Etc.
I've never seen it do so.Does dot size dictate distance?