I googled 'New Jersey Permanent Spousal Support' and got a couple of informative articles from lawyers. Interesting.
Understand the empty feeling you may be having. I got divorced, unwillingly in my case, after almost 20 years of marriage. I was initially devastated, but pretty quickly determined that it was the best for both of us - we really had nothing in common but our marriage. In our case we had treated each other well, and despite my worries about being taken to the cleaners, we came out on the other side still friendly.
I'm sure your situation may be different, but I went through a depression, so expect that and take care of yourself.
The attorney I hired was acquainted with the other attorney and he asked me if I wanted him to take the lead, as the other attorney would most likely take the easy route if offered. He was up front that his fee would be higher going this route, but the outcome would probably be what I would consider more even. This turned out to be true.
My mom gave me perhaps the best two pieces of advice I heard during this process. The first was that God doesn't necessarily answer our prayers the way we want. The second was to quit feeling sorry for myself and to not darken her door again until I'd gotten laid. Wise woman, my mom.
Life does go on.
Are there different kinds of alimony?
There are several types of alimony in New Jersey as follows:
Limited duration alimony - consists of payments for a specified period of time and is intended to help the needier spouse recover financially from the divorce;
Reimbursement alimony - is ordered to provide fair and just compensation in situations where one spouse provided financial support during the marriage, while the other obtained a degree in a professional program, such as law or medicine, and
Rehabilitative alimony - financial support that enables a spouse without training or education to obtain the schooling and credentials necessary to become self-sufficient.
This article will focus on the final kind of alimony—permanent alimony. "Permanent alimony" is theoretically a financial award that goes on indefinitely, whereas limited duration, reimbursement, and rehabilitative alimony all have definite end dates.
How does a New Jersey judge decide whether to award permanent alimony?
The court will set a hearing on permanent alimony, where both sides will have the opportunity to present testimony and evidence. The judge will then apply all of the following factors to the testimony and evidence to decide whether to award permanent alimony, and in what amount:
- the actual need and ability of the parties to pay
- the duration of the marriage or civil union (which is a legal contract, roughly equivalent to marriage, between same-sex partners in New Jersey)
- the age, physical and emotional health of the spouses
- the standard of living established in the marriage or civil union (this means, the way the parties actually lived), and the likelihood that each party can maintain a reasonably comparable standard of living
- the earning capacities, educational levels, vocational skills, and employability of the parties
- the length of absence from the job market of the party seeking alimony
- any parental responsibilities for children of the marriage or union
- the time and expense necessary for the spouse who's seeking alimony to obtain enough training and education to become gainfully employed and acquire assets and income independently
- the history of the financial or non-financial contributions to the marriage or civil union by each party, including contributions to the care and education of the children and interruption of personal careers and educational opportunities
- the equitable (fair and reasonable) distribution of property ordered in the divorce and any payouts on equitable distribution, directly or indirectly, out of current income, provided that this consideration is just
- the income available to either party through investment of any assets
- the tax treatment and consequences to both parties if alimony was awarded, including the designation of all or a portion of the payment as a non-taxable payment,
- any other factors the court deems relevant.
Whenever a spouse requests permanent alimony, the court has to make "specific findings on the evidence" on these 13 factors. This means that the judge has to issue a written order and explain how the evidence affected each factor. The court also has to address the dependent spouse's needs, the dependent spouse's ability to satisfy those needs, and the paying spouse's ability to maintain the dependent spouse at the previous standard of living.
Who is likely to get permanent alimony?
Permanent alimony is most commonly awarded in situations where the parties were married for a long time before the divorce. Sometimes, it's awarded in shorter-term marriages, but only if there are extenuating circumstances, like the dependent spouse becoming disabled.
Typically, permanent alimony is awarded where one spouse was financially dependent on the other during the marriage. For example, in one common scenario, one spouse stays home to raise the children while the other spouse enters the workforce, becomes financially successful, and ultimately provides the family's sole financial support. When that happens, the spouse who stayed home for many years to raise the children and maintain the household might be awarded permanent alimony.
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