More sadness, and ugly crap caused by evil people.
I've experienced similar disillusionment just over the course of my ~12 years in so far. It's easy and understandable to be frustrated by some of the misguided thinking and poor leadership at times. Going 100% off-grid is way too much of a pain in the ass for me, though. I enjoy cars and air conditioning too much.
Eventually, at least in my case, you realize or remember that most of the people in these organizations give a shit and work really hard to do good things, and don't get any credit in the press because of the same reasons that Soldiers doing well or local LE doing well never makes the news, and if then, it's some page 10 1-paragraph attaboy, if that.
But after coming around, if you still want to make a difference, it makes sense to join up with an organization where you can make a difference, if you're eligible of course.
As for your friend 'choosing' New Jersey - the way I understand initial post-grad FBI assignments, it works the same way as PCS requests in the Army; Your three choices are removed from the option pool, and a sadistic admin clerk throws a dart at a map to figure out the rest.