For myself, I find heavier loads have less perceived recoil in my handguns, I see it in 9mm 147gr vs 115, in 40 180gr vs 165, and in 45 230gr vs 200. This is for full power duty ammo.
For practice and competition I reload 124gr FMJ, if I were a more serious competitor, I would not worry about the expense and go up to a 148gr bullet.
I'm currently carrying 147 gr. Golden Sabers and when I run low on them I'm sure I will replace them with either the same thing or a 147gr equivalent from Doc's list.
Ultimately, no practical carry handgun is a magic hammer of Thor and all that we can reasonably expect is that they act as a somewhat long range drill press to make holes in things. Better to spend time ensuring that we can use the drill press to the best of our ability then worry about tungsten carbide vs cobalt vs high speed steel drill bits. Just don't use Chinesium drill bits.
Gringop