Chuck Norris

[Bigghoss]

Chuck Norris clogs the toilet every time he goes to the bathroom. Even when he's only taking a piss.

In most men, one testical is larger than the other. In Chuck Norris, both testicals are larger than the other.

Chuck Norris once set a world record by eating three 72 ounce steaks in an hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with the waitress.

Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin he built with his own two hands.

[Cypher]

[JohnO]

[45dotACP]

I grew up on some Walker Texas Ranger as a kid... probably started martial arts because of Chuck Norris.

Also, he is a BJJ black belt under JJ Machado. I think there was an interview of him describing the first time he ever rolled with Royce and Rickson Gracie in the 80s, before the UFC

Also...his tears cure cancer....too bad he has never cried

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[rayrevolver]

My mom helped as a language advisor on a Chuck Norris movie. The story goes he liked her and she got to speak 1 line in the movie. I won't say which one but its on my DVR!

His brother Aaron directed it. Both he and the young star came over for dinner one night. I never got to meet Chuck or go on set.

Always be a big fan Chuck Norris!!!

Edit: The Delta Force was on a few months ago and it was nice watching it again. I remember liking Invasion USA but its been a very long time since I have seen it.

[Gadfly]

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun....

[WobblyPossum]

http://www.chucknorrisjokes.net/

You're welcome.

[Irelander]

[jetfire]

My favorite is still Chuck Norris making a Chuck Norris Joke, in the Expendables 2 -

Anecdotally, my dad was in the Air Force with Chuck Norris. And of course, growing up in Dallas during the '90s, meant that Chuck Norris was absolutely a portion of our culture. Walker, Texas Ranger - was a can't miss show for most of my adolescent life. I took karate, because of Chuck Norris. I dressed up as a ninja or Chuck Norris for six or seven years for Halloween. I went to the Texas Ranger Museum, because of Chuck Norris. I loved revolvers, because Walker, carried one. I'm not sure that one can overstate the importance of Chuck Norris to a kid growing up in Dallas/Ft. Worth in the '90s.

PS: I saw Expendables 2 in the theaters, opening night. When this joke began, you could hear a pin drop. When Chuck Norris starts grinning - the theater erupted in applause. Seriously, a great time to be in a movie theater, when everyone witnesses a moment that will live forever, simultaneously.

Chuck Norris was the entire reason I took TKD when I was young, and his later use of a Beretta 92 Inox in Ranger, Texas Walker was a big part of my early fascination with them.

[45dotACP]

Chuck Norris was the entire reason I took TKD when I was young, and his later use of a Beretta 92 Inox in Ranger, Texas Walker was a big part of my early fascination with them.

Plot twist...it was a Taurus

But let's be real...any gun would be on its best behavior with Chuck Norris.

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