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Thread: Side conversations inspired by Roll Call Stories Thread

  1. #11
    Modding this sack of shit BehindBlueI's's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hufnagel View Post
    Might I suggest, a Patreon thing? Especially if you think you can publish a "chapter" worth of material on a regular/consistent basis.
    I'm not sure how that sort of thing works. I might look into it.

    I am starting to jot down notes for things as I remember them or they happen, though. I'm removing some irons from the fire at the end of this year, and will consider doing the book or at least doing installments.
    Sorta around sometimes for some of your shitty mod needs.

  2. #12
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    I would also be interested in buying the book or helping fund the chapters.

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by BehindBlueI's View Post
    Oh, and the LT questioned my use of "if'n". He's under the impression if'n isn't a word. I explained I'm fluent in hillbilly and if'n most certainly is a word.
    Thank you for starting my day with a great story and a good laugh.
    I translate hillbilly for my wife when we're in NC (where we lived for 15+years). Hillbillies are my people too.
    "No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." - Thomas Jefferson, Virginia Constitution, Draft 1, 1776

  4. #14
    Site Supporter Hambo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BehindBlueI's View Post
    Today one of my officers arrested a guy for DUI on a riding mower. The dispatch was "caller says male is driving a riding mower down (fairly major road) with a case of beer between his legs, a beer in the cup holder, and a beer in his hand.
    Now in his mind he wasn't DUI, since you don't need a license to drive a lawnmower.




    My wife hired some tree cutters and said to me, "I need a translator. You speak redneck, go talk to them." Hillbillies...rednecks...they're all good. Great story, BBI.
    Last edited by Hambo; 08-18-2018 at 07:07 AM.
    "Gunfighting is a thinking man's game. So we might want to bring thinking back into it."-MDFA

    Beware of my temper, and the dog that I've found...

  5. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by Hambo View Post
    Now in his mind he wasn't DUI, since you don't need a license to drive a lawnmower.
    Depending on the mower, he may have an argument. It appears Indiana excludes "Farm Tractors" in the definition of motor vehicles, so if the mower is big enough...

    Not a lawyer, no real understanding of the state, etc, etc.

  6. #16
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    BBI the table next to me looked at me like I was a window licker I laughed so loudly at that story
    Welcome to Africa, bring a hardhat.

  7. #17
    banana republican blues's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoyGBiv View Post
    Thank you for starting my day with a great story and a good laugh.
    I translate hillbilly for my wife when we're in NC (where we lived for 15+years). Hillbillies are my people too.
    Hillbillies? The effrontery! We are holler dwellers.

    (We may have a redneck or two though. )
    There's nothing civil about this war.

  8. #18
    banana republican blues's Avatar
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    One of our local residents, (now deceased), after having been deprived of his license would, for some time, come to the local watering hole on his rider mower. Eventually he was reduced to walking or having his wife drive him. (Until she was eventually 86'd from the establishment as well for her conduct unbecoming.)

    He used to own a motel in town but lost interest after they closed the bar on its premises.
    There's nothing civil about this war.

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by blues View Post
    Hillbillies? The effrontery! We are holler dwellers.

    (We may have a redneck or two though. )
    Rednecks, actually. I was just going with the story.

    My NC neighbor referred to himself as "The Pig Man", because, of course, he was a for-hire BBQ guy with a hand painted sign and two whole-pig cookers parked on his lawn. His wife made the awesomest biscuits.
    "No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." - Thomas Jefferson, Virginia Constitution, Draft 1, 1776

  10. #20
    Modding this sack of shit BehindBlueI's's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheRoland View Post
    Depending on the mower, he may have an argument. It appears Indiana excludes "Farm Tractors" in the definition of motor vehicles, so if the mower is big enough...

    Not a lawyer, no real understanding of the state, etc, etc.
    It doesn't have to be a "motor vehicle" in Indiana. Just a "vehicle".

    IC 9-30-5-1 ...
    Sec. 1. (a) A person who operates a vehicle with an alcohol concentration equivalent to at least eight-hundredths (0.08) gram of alcohol but less than fifteen-hundredths (0.15) gram of alcohol per:
    There's no requirement for the vehicle to be a "motor vehicle". It's not terribly unusual in some parts of the state for the Amish to get DUIs with their horse and buggies:

    https://fox43.com/2016/08/19/amish-t...s-on-the-roof/
    Sorta around sometimes for some of your shitty mod needs.

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