Originally Posted by
RevolverRob
I'll pass on living in that neighborhood.
Last winter, I was home visiting my folks and did some suspension work on the car. Got done, took the car down a local twisty road to check for clunks, bumps, etc. I was driving fairly aggressively in an effort to try to rattle something loose. In the process, I passed the marked neighborhood watch patrol car, complete with flashing yellow light, and an over-eager volunteer at the wheel. To my surprise this car started following me while I was driving. I slowed, turned off the main road and went over some potholes and speed-bumps to check the suspension and was still being followed. At this point, confused, I decided to simply drive back to my parents' house.
The vehicle followed me all the way there. And that was when I confronted the eager beaver behind the wheel, after parking and exiting my car.
"Can I help you?"
"You were speeding! I'm waiting for the cops to show up to write you a ticket."
Me, staring confused at the woman behind the wheel of this vehicle, "Ma'am that isn't how it works."
"Well, if the cops don't come, I'm going to write you a summons."
"Uhh...a summons for what and on whose authority?"
"Neighborhood Watch's authority! You can't go speeding around our neighborhood! That's hoodlumism and we don't have it here. Now you get back in your car and wait for the police!"
Me staring, still confused, "Have a nice night ma'am."
I turned around and started for the house. Then she got out of the patrol vehicle and started to chase after me. But I turned back and glared at her and she thought better of it.
___
Why the fuck would someone do these things? After 20 minutes of the cops not showing up, idling in front of the house, she finally left. I did, however, get a hastily written chastising note under my windshield wiper (my "summons", maybe?). I filed that one away in the pile of useless passive-aggressive shit stupid people do, when they don't have better things to do. I look back on it and laugh now, but if that eager-beaver had been a bit more eager, I might have been staring down the barrel of someone's gun. Or worse...had them staring down the barrel of mine.
FWIW, after this incident my parents went to the local Neighborhood Watch meeting and instituted a vote. The watch is now disbanded. That's how you lose your nosy neighboring privileges folks...