At times must be tempted to spit on his hands, raise the black flag, and start slitting throats. H.L. Menken
With this in mind and a little wine in me, I bought one of these:
http://www.coldsteel.com/1917-cutlass.html
Great reviews and good price at Midway USA ($160.00, free shipping). How cool, I've always wanted a "real" sword. Why, well see above. It arrives at the end of the month. Aarrggh... shiver me timbers! Hopefully it's as cool as it looks. Need a flintlock too, but that's for later...