Do gun manuals have a troubleshooting section?
Do gun manuals have a troubleshooting section?
Is the boy you were proud of the man you are?
Fimbo iliyo mkononi, ndio iuwayo nyoka!
Oboy, here we go...
”But in the end all of these ideas just manufacture new criminals when the problem isn't a lack of criminals.” -JRB
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Just told that one to my sister-in-law who used to teach in county juvie -- she couldn't stop laughing.Originally Posted by Bart Carter
She teaches in "parole school" now. She's a good teacher and doesn't talk down to the kids to the point where some say they want her as their permanent teacher and don't want to go back to their regular school. Sometimes we joke the kids are going to commit more crimes to stay in her class.
Do military barbers shave their privates?
Is the boy you were proud of the man you are?
Fimbo iliyo mkononi, ndio iuwayo nyoka!
Do Italian mothers raise dumbbells?
There's nothing civil about this war.
In the paper here this morning, some dentist's family ran a 58 column-inch obituary about him. I checked the rate card for the paper; that cost them $1,705 (plus tax).
Which leads me to this joke:
Ollie, a life-long resident of northern Minnesota died. His wife, Lena, was at the funeral parlor, making the final arrangements.
The mortician brought up the subject of an obituary. Lena said: "I don't want to pay for such foolishness. Everybody already knows Ollie died."
The mortician said: :I understand, but the first five words of an obituary are at no charge to you."
Lena thought about it and said: "Put in 'Ollie died'."
The mortician said: "You still have three free words to add something."
Lena thought on that and declared: "Have it say: 'Ollie died. Boat for sale.' "
If we have to march off into the next world, let us walk there on the bodies of our enemies.
A priest, a rabbit and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender asks the rabbit: "What'll ya' have?"
The rabbit says: "I dunno, I'm only here because of autocorrect."
If we have to march off into the next world, let us walk there on the bodies of our enemies.
As i get older, I have found out that I have to stay positive.
For example, the other day I fell down the stairs. Instead of getting upset, I just thought, "Wow, that's the fastest I've moved in years!"
With liberty and justice for all...must be 18, void where prohibited, some restrictions may apply, not available in all states.
Two guys grow up together, but after college one moves to Georgia and the other to Texas. They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf and catch up with each other.
At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf and head for lunch.
"Where you wanna go?"
"Hooters."
"Why Hooters?"
"They have those servers with the big boobs, tight shorts and the gorgeous legs."
"You're on."
At age 42, they meet and play golf again
"Where you wanna go for lunch?"
"Hooters."
"Again? Why?"
"They have cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games."
"OK."
At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where you wanna go for lunch?"
"Hooters.
"Why?"
"The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking."
"OK."
At age 62 they meet again.
After a round of golf, one says, "Where you wanna go?"
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy."
"Good choice"
At age 72 they meet again.
Once again, after a round of golf, one says, "Where shall we go for lunch?"
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they have senior discounts."
"Great choice."
At age 82 they meet and play again. "Where should we go for lunch?"
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"Because we've never been there before."
Okay, let's give it a try.
With liberty and justice for all...must be 18, void where prohibited, some restrictions may apply, not available in all states.
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