Somehow it seems sad to me that men and women are having discussions about their sex toys instead of enjoying what was once considered mutually pleasurable and required no gizmos, battery operated or otherwise.
But then men, (and women),have also apparently been going the way of the dodo and dinosaur, so I can't say I'm all that surprised.
There's nothing civil about this war.
Yeah, yeah. And bread used to cost a nickle.
MOAR MEMES!!!
Originally Posted by MattyD380
Ah - but toys just add more fun to the rest! They aren’t a replacement, or don’t have to be...
Ken
BBI: ...”you better not forget the safe word because shit's about to get weird”...
revchuck38: ...”mo' ammo is mo' betta' unless you're swimming or on fire.”
Oh, Johnny and Janie, they were the perfect married couple
But not in bed
Oh, they tried taking drugs, How-To books, even Dr. Ruth
But for all intents and purposes their love life was dead
'Til one day Janie went over to the Pink Pussycat Boutique
She bought a long cylindrical thing
Now Janie is smiling, Johnny is not
Every night you can hear him sing
He says, "Our love is bein' kept alive by artificial means
You've grown emotionally attached to that little pink machine
Our relationship is not as healthy as it seems
'Cause our love is being kept alive by artificial means''
Oh, Johnny went down to the barroom
He bought one drink, he bought two, he bought three
Oh, he moaned to the bartender, the state of his married life
Bartender said, "Hey Bud, just listen to me''
So Johnny went over to the Pink Pussycat Boutique
He bought a plastic blow-up doll
Now Johnny is smiling, Janie is not
She is angry, she is jealous, she's appalled
She says, "Our love is bein' kept alive by artificial means
You've grown emotionally attached to that poly-ethylene
Our relationship is not as healthy as it seems
'Cause our love is being kept alive by artificial means''
Wires
(Wires)
Switches
(Switches)
Batteries
(Batteries)
Plastic
(Plastic)
Tufts of artificial hair
Who'd ever think they could replace the love
(Love)
Humans used to share?
(Humans used to, humans used to)
(Humans used to, humans used to)
Then one fateful day those batteries died
At the same moment that, that big doll sprung a leak
Johnny looked at Janie looked at Johnny looked at Janie
Oh, they both found it difficult to speak
I wish I could say they threw those contraptions away
And fell in love all over again
But Johnny taped up that hissing woman
When Janie stole the batteries from his Sony Walkman
Because their love is bein kept alive by artificial means
They've grown emotionally attached to those modern sex machines
Their relationship is not as healthy as it seems
'Cause their love is being kept alive, love is being kept alive
Love is being kept alive by artificial means
”But in the end all of these ideas just manufacture new criminals when the problem isn't a lack of criminals.” -JRB
Don't monkey around with chimps.
There's nothing civil about this war.
" La rose est sans pourquoi, elle fleurit parce qu’elle fleurit ; Elle n’a souci d’elle-même, ne demande pas si on la voit. » Angelus Silesius
"There are problems in this universe for which there are no answers." Paul Muad'dib
We wish to thank the United Network Command for Law and Enforcement, without whose assistance this program would not have been possible.
one of these is a dummy; the other has someone's hand up his ass, operating him.
wait a minute...
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