While ive done my best to avoid dating such women , many of my gun owning friends find themselves "limited" once the engagement/marriage happens. A few .mil buddies are totally forbidden by their wives from owning firearms-one confided in me that he kept his guns with a pal to dodge that problem.
Whats a man to do about the issue,hypnotism excluded?
The Minority Marksman.
"When you meet a swordsman, draw your sword: Do not recite poetry to one who is not a poet."
-a Ch'an Buddhist axiom.
Sadly the initial decision should have been "drop her like a sack of potatoes", if she doesn't respect your values she's not worth wasting time on. JMHO but I usually make damn sure my values line up with someone before I decide to make any moves. I can't imagine living with anyone that was a militant anti-gun-in-house person, just like I couldn't live with someone that was militantly anti-dog or anti-beef or something.
That doesn't really help you at all, but I'll never understand some people's relationship choices!
Semper Gumby, Always Flexible
Your friends are what, in their early 20s? Don't worry, they'll all get divorced.Originally Posted by GardoneVT
Be a man about it. Or a woman if the shoe is on the other foot.
My wife doesn't like that I ride motorcycles. But it was part of the package and that was explained up front. I still ride.
None of that means don't compromise a bit. I got extra life and disability insurance and don't ride on Friday or Saturday nights now.
My wife likes to shop. We have a budget now so we can increase our savings. She sticks to the budget even though she would rather buy more super-expensive shoes.
Like Peally said - make a good decision in the first place. If you are dating or marrying someone who says "I don't like guns," that is fine. If you are dating or marrying someone who says "I don't like that you like guns," that is not.
Take them to the range. Teach them to shoot. It's been my experience (several times over) that even an anti-gun person can be won over with calm thoughtful discussion and some hands on experience. They might not warm up to a full embrace, but once the fear is gone it'll take on the characteristics of a more "normal" hobby.
If the GF/spouse is so opposed to be completely close minded, then, maybe it's not a relationship that has any future.
I tend to avoid intimate relationships with people who are closed minded about their irrational fear of inanimate objects.
First time I took my GF (now wife) to the range she out-shot me. Military brat!
"No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." - Thomas Jefferson, Virginia Constitution, Draft 1, 1776
Buy your buddies' guns for cheep!
Sorry, couldn't resist. It's a clash of values. If she won't stand a gun in the house...even if well secured, then it's time to throw the fish back in the sea. Trust me when I say the pond is never as small as you think. There really are lot of fish in it. Even fish in their mid to late 20s and early 30s
Straight up, dump her. I've been married 25 years mostly because neither of us tries to exercise power over the other. If one of you wants to change/mold/shape the other one into something they're not, Caleb is right. Divorce is on the horizon.
"Gunfighting is a thinking man's game. So we might want to bring thinking back into it."-MDFA
Beware of my temper, and the dog that I've found...
This ^^^^^
Buy your friends' guns, get cooler friends, prosper.
I will never understand the guys who say stuff like "I just bought X, now I have to hide it from the wife" or "it's a good thing she doesn't go in my man cave or she'd find all my guns" or whatever.
When I get a new gun, it's usually "Hey, check this out and tell me if you like the trigger more than your old 686" or "hey, I can't find an optic I thought I had around here. Did I give you an Aimpoint to put on your 12.5 recently?"
Even my friends' wives that don't really shoot are usually more of the "Oh, that is so cool and shiny! Let's plan a range day for everyone!" variety. Or at worst "just be careful".
In my experience, if you're cool and you have guns, guns are cool. So be cool, and keep the guns.
This is a thread where I built a boat I designed and which I very occasionally update with accounts of using it, which is really fun as long as I'm not driving over logs and blowing up the outboard.
https://pistol-forum.com/showthread....ilding-a-skiff
I have to agree with the pessimism above. Marriages that have major philosophical gaps don't tend to be as long-lasting on average.
"The one who cares the least controls the relationship."
Either your buddies will accept that they're now gunless -- in which case they couldn't have really cared that much to begin with -- or the wives will relent because they see it's important to their husbands or the marriages will implode.
Couples don't need to agree on every single thing. But one spouse can't make all the important decisions for the other, all the time, without things turning ugly fast.
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