I believe all of us obsess about these things because they are the things we can control.
We want to believe we can influence the outcome of a violent life-and-death personal physical struggle by having the best gun, in the best caliber, using the very most potent cartridge available in that caliber.
When "the balloon goes up" (as Col. Cooper used to say), those are all good things to have, of course, but they probably mean a lot less than qualities such as personal awareness & readiness, and personal courage & skill.
I too carry Remington 158gr LSWCHP+P or Gold Dot 135gr+P JHP "short barrel" .38 Special in a 1 7/8" barrel J-frame or two from time to time, especially in the hottest "less clothing worn" summertime , and don't rue that condition as being notably less prepared than when carrying a G26, G19, G30 or Colt CCO.