I love Kipling

[LittleLebowski]

My son," said the Norman Baron, "I am dying, and you will
be heir
To all the broad acres in England that William gave me for
share
When he conquered the Saxon at Hastings, and a nice little
handful it is.
But before you go over to rule it I want you to understand this:--

"The Saxon is not like us Normans. His manners are not so polite.
But he never means anything serious till he talks about justice
right.
When he stands like an ox in the furrow--with his sullen set eyes
on your own,
And grumbles, 'This isn't fair dealing,' my son, leave the Saxon
alone.

[Joe in PNG]

You talk o' better food for us, an' schools, an' fires, an' all:
We'll wait for extry rations if you treat us rational.
Don't mess about the cook-room slops, but prove it to our face
The Widow's Uniform is not the soldier-man's disgrace.
For it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an` Chuck him out, the brute! "
But it's " Saviour of 'is country " when the guns begin to shoot;
An' it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' anything you please;
An 'Tommy ain't a bloomin' fool - you bet that Tommy sees!

Of course, this one:

Then the Gods of the Market tumbled, and their smooth-tongued wizards withdrew
And the hearts of the meanest were humbled and began to believe it was true
That All is not Gold that Glitters, and Two and Two make Four
And the Gods of the Copybook Headings limped up to explain it once more.

As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began.
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool's bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!

[Le Français]

I keep six honest serving men (they taught me all I knew); their names are What and Why and When And How and Where and Who.


Take everything you like seriously, except yourselves.




Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears.

[Kanye Wyoming]

So glad you started this thread.

My dad picked me up from Hebrew School kindergarten one Sunday and took me to see the Jungle Book movie. I was entranced. When I learned to read the next year I tried reading the book, which we had at home. No luck. Then I tried again a few years later; also no luck. Then I tried again in college after taking a course in British Imperial history, and I was hooked. If is one of the most profound things ever written; the instruction manual for how to be a man.

[blues]

"Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,. And—which is more—you'll be a Man, my son!"

[JohnO]

War is an ill thing, as I surely know. But 'twould be an ill world for weaponless dreamers if evil men were not now and then slain.
-Rudyard Kipling

[peterb]

If anyone’s got a taste for how structures work:

https://americanliterature.com/author/rudyard-kipling/short-story/the-ship-that-found-herself

“… There was just as much groaning and straining as ever, but it was not so loud or squeaky in tone; and when the ship quivered she did not jar stiffly, like a poker hit on the floor, but gave with a supple little waggle, like a perfectly balanced golf-club.

"We have made a most amazing discovery," said the stringers, one after another. "A discovery that entirely changes the situation. We have found, for the first time in the history of ship-building, that the inward pull of the deck-beams and the outward thrust of the frames locks us, as it were, more closely in our places, and enables us to endure a strain which is entirely without parallel in the records of marine architecture."”

[Jim Watson]

Middle verse of The Road Song of the Bandar Log

Here we sit in a branchy row,
Thinking of beautiful things we know;
Dreaming of deeds that we mean to do,
All complete, in a minute or two --
Something noble and grand and good,
Won by merely wishing we could.
Now we're going to -- never mind,
Brother, thy tail hangs down behind!

Seems to me that we have a lot of Bandar Log in government.

[SAWBONES]

Most of the final verse of The Young British Soldier:

When you're wounded and left on Afghanistan's plains,
And the women come out to cut up what remains,
Jest roll to your rifle and blow out your brains
An' go to your Gawd like a soldier.

[Duces Tecum]

It was not part of their blood,
It came to them very late,
With long arrears to make good,
When the Saxon began to hate.

They were not easily moved,
They were icy-willing to wait,
Til every count should be proved,
Ere the Saxon began to hate,

Their voices were even and low,
Their eyes were level and straight.
There was neither sign nor show
When the Saxon began to hate.

It was not preached to the crowd,
It was not taught by the state.
No man spoke it aloud
When the Saxon began to hate.

It was not suddenly bred.
It will not swiftly abate.
Through the chilled years ahead,
When Time shall count from the date
That the Saxon began to hate.

[ACP230]

"When harf of your bullets fly wide in the ditch,
Don't call your Martini a cross-eyed old bitch.
She's human as you are, treat her as sich.
And she'll fight for the young British soldier..."

Since I read this it has (mostly) kept me from blaming my rifle when
I shoot badly.

[314159]

Young dude to dudette: "Do you like Kipling?"

Dudette: "Why you naughty boy! I've never kipled in my life."

I'm sorry...

[Jim Watson]

Took longer for that one to get here than I expected.

Reminiscent of Marilyn Monroe:
"I don't make pornography, I don't even have a pornograph."
but
"Of course I had something on, I had the radio on."

[LittleLebowski]

"Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,. And—which is more—you'll be a Man, my son!"

Literally hanging in my house so that my kids see it every day, the full poem.