Super SIMP and the SEAL

[ToddG]

Saw two guys at the range today who were just too funny not to mention.

Guy #1 was what I have named The Super SIMP (http://pistol-training.com/archives/70). As fast as he could, he would empty his Taurus Judge "snubnose" at the target, put the gun down, pick up his XD, load it, empty it at the target, put it down, pick up his CZ, load it, empty it at the target, put it down, pick up his Taurus, load it, and empty it at the target. Not quite as funny as the C.A.R./Weaver/Iso/Reverse-Weaver/Reverse-C.A.R. dude a few months back, but close.

Guy #2 was standing around the lounge waiting for a lane telling people he was a S.E.A.L. Then when he got out on the line his buddy had to show him how to load an AR magazine. Man, BUDS has really gone downhill I guess. :rolleyes:

[Joe in PNG]

And SIMP's target had just one, ragged 1/2" hole right dead center, yeah?

[SecondsCount]

I see nothing wrong with Guy#1 practicing with his carry rotation. :D

[Kyle Reese]

Myself and another Staff member were at the NRA range a while back waiting for a lane. We saw a portly fellow proceed to regale the young lady at the counter with his tales of pioneering the use of the .500 S&W revolver in Iraq with "Special Forces".

All kinds of posers out there.

[YVK]

I've had this a couple of times happen to me, last time actually two weeks ago, and I find it hilarious. I was shooting what I call all-around maintenance session, a little bit of everything, marksmanship, speed, WHO/SHO, pressouts, 2-R-2 etc, mostly at reduced size targets. I had a reasonably decent day. Next lane to me a nice young couple was peppering a silhouette target at 7 yards from their XD, cup-and-saucer and all.

About 3/4 into my practice, while I was loading my mags, the young fellow politely stuck his head in and asked me what kind of LE/agency outfit I belonged to. Since this had happened before and I had my response down, I proceeded to vigorously deny belonging to anything LE-related, which is of course an absolute truth. A very prompt denial, combined with an open smile and look straight into person's eyes almost predictably provoked an impression that I was lying and hiding my true association with the League of Shadows or the Fraternity. The fellow replied something like "but you shoot professionally..."

[Tamara]

There's a guy who shows up at the local range occasionally, always with the same two guns: An FN FiveSeveN and an S&W Performance Center ~4" Model 500.

He alternates between doing mag dumps with the centerfire .22 into the vicinity of the target, and then grabbing his 500 and flinching so bad that the rounds occasionally kick dirt up between him and the ten yard line. He does this for approximately fifteen to twenty minutes, then leaves.

Out of all the idiocy that occurs at public ranges, I don't know why this cat in particular grinds me to a halt, but he does. Oh how he does. :rolleyes:

[Angered_Kabar]

Saw a couple guys doing the whole mag dumps on the rotation thing with their various combloc rifles. During the 45 minutes it took for them to load their magazines they had all sorts of conversations about how they got ripped off buying this crappy clip and that crappy clip, and how terrible AR15s are because they eat where they shit, and if someone just puts an AK gas system on one it'll improve instantly and gain stopping power, and how Taurus autos are better than Glocks because they feel better, etc.

"Hey man, we should probably load these up before we go to the range because this is boring. If only there was a quick way to load clips."

So they finally started firing towards the targets and 5 minutes later packed up and started to leave but decided to ask me a question about the legalities of open carry. I think I overheard them saying something about me knowing my shit because I managed to hit my target most of the time with my G19.

[Simon]

All the stories you guys tell about public ranges makes me very glad that I have a private range. In all my years in LE, I never had to use a public range, only leased or department owned. Twice in the last year I went to an indoor range, once for my CC permit, and once to try a rental gun before purchase. Now I understand the attitude of the ROs.

[LittleLebowski]

I've had this a couple of times happen to me, last time actually two weeks ago, and I find it hilarious. I was shooting what I call all-around maintenance session, a little bit of everything, marksmanship, speed, WHO/SHO, pressouts, 2-R-2 etc, mostly at reduced size targets. I had a reasonably decent day. Next lane to me a nice young couple was peppering a silhouette target at 7 yards from their XD, cup-and-saucer and all.

About 3/4 into my practice, while I was loading my mags, the young fellow politely stuck his head in and asked me what kind of LE/agency outfit I belonged to. Since this had happened before and I had my response down, I proceeded to vigorously deny belonging to anything LE-related, which is of course an absolute truth. A very prompt denial, combined with an open smile and look straight into person's eyes almost predictably provoked an impression that I was lying and hiding my true association with the League of Shadows or the Fraternity. The fellow replied something like "but you shoot professionally..."

I had that happen as well. They smirked as I told them that I am an IT guy.

[Chris Rhines]

Guy #2 was standing around the lounge waiting for a lane telling people he was a S.E.A.L. Then when he got out on the line his buddy had to show him how to load an AR magazine. Man, BUDS has really gone downhill I guess. Wow. Sarah must not have been working that day, or else she would probably have thrown the guy out on his ass.

The really sad thing is that the NRA Range is probably one of the best-run, lowest-dirtbag-count ranges in the country.

-C

[Tamara]

The really sad thing is that the NRA Range is probably one of the best-run, lowest-dirtbag-count ranges in the country.

I'm pretty happy with the Eagle Creek Park range here in Indy. The staff is composed of fairly serious gun guys, the kind who actually compete and take classes and suchlike, they're polite, keep an eye out for the occasional imbecile, and... well, the best thing of all is it's a public, city-funded pistol and shotgun range right inside city limits, which is pretty frickin' cool.

New York City may have good nightlife, Chicago may have restaurants, Boston may have history, and DC may have museums, but none of 'em has a publicly-owned pistol range in a city park.

[Maple Syrup Actual]

I had that happen as well. They smirked as I told them that I am an IT guy.

That even happens up here in Canada...I always tell people I am "a construction worker" and while most of the people I encounter take that to mean "I work in construction" there is a small subset of people I encounter on the rare occasions I go to open-entry public range time that interpret it as "I can't tell you what my super dark Jack Bauer job is."

I'm always a bit torn between the eye-roll and the "wishing I was something cooler than a construction worker" response.

Sent from my brain using my hands

[SeriousStudent]

I had that happen as well. They smirked as I told them that I am an IT guy.

Same here. About 15 years ago, a buddy bought an 870 with one of those Remington factory top-folding stocks, because it "looked cool." I was trying to persuade him that a simple wood stock was more efficient for his purposes. So after work on day, we drove out to the range in his company car, with our shotguns.

The car happened to be a blue Ford Crown Vic. So we get out wearing grey pinstripe suits, wingtips and Ray-Bans, set up targets, and proceed to run drills with Glock pistols and Remington 870's.

After a while, two other range users waddle over to watch us. One asks, "what do you guys do for a living?"

"We're computer geeks."

Long pause, looks are exchanged......

"Look, if you can't tell us, there's no need to be rude."

I laughed. And best of all, my buddy switched to a wooden stock.

[Al T.]

Saw the flip side of this a while back. Buddy of mine is a gifted shooter and was at FT Jackson on his terminal assignment before retirement. He was both a former member of the Ranger Regiment and Ranger qualified.

I'm working with one of my younger friends on polishing some handgun skills on the plate rack when Jay shows up in uniform to try some new reloading recipe on his lunch break. Jay has a "Ranger" front license plate and is wearing his Ranger tab. He eases in rotation with my young friend and proceeds to burn the plates down.

Younger buddy looks at me as Jay drives back to the fort and says "Boy, those Rangers sure can shoot, can't they?". :rolleyes:

Guess I'm glad my buddy the lab tech didn't show up in scrubs..... :p

[JMS]

I had that happen as well. They smirked as I told them that I am an IT guy.

Slightly on the same vein....

About 4 months ago, I was in the setting up for a 3rd-of-howevermany interations on one drill or another; stopped and muttered a curse (yelled, most likely; ear pro....) because I'd just jammed a mag to use for my required reload and forgot to put it in the pouch. Turned to grab it off the table, and noted a probably-late-20s couple paying rapt attention to my every move. A bit disconcerting, but not unusual; often some fascinating stuff to see in other lanes, be it awesome-awesome or :totaltrainwreck: awesome.

Mr. I-Hate-AIWB-and-You-Should-Too R.O. saw me take note of them and leaned in to shout "I told them that you're one of the regulars to watch...!"

I'm really only a middle/fair pistolero, and was having a REALLY bad shooting day, so he most likely didn't completely understand my reasons for responding with "What...!? WHY!??!!"

;)

I was up in the area on Sunday; my driver from OIF1 and I traipsed around the goon-show and had lunch. Toyed with the idea of hitting the range before heading home, but it was only 1430, and I couldn't wait until 1730 for the hopeless, the hapless and the space shuttle door-gunners to clear out.

[Byron]

...space shuttle door-gunner...
Ho. Lee. Crap.

You've just invented my ultimate dream job. Thank you; I now have something to which I can aspire.

[Default.mp3]

Ho. Lee. Crap.

You've just invented my ultimate dream job. Thank you; I now have something to which I can aspire.

Don't forget to get the unit patch:
http://i.imgur.com/R0dSt.jpg

http://milspecmonkey.com/store/patches/shuttledoorgunner

[Byron]

Don't forget to get the unit patch
Oh man - I didn't realize it was a pre-existing joke.

I'm ordering a few of those right now (seriously).

[JMS]

C'mon....anything I say or type is stolen.

An original idea and a cold drink of water would probably kill me!

[sheperd80]

Im reminded of an older asian man who comes to my range. He's there almost everytime i come doing the same routine. Theres really nothing wrong with what he does, I just find it interesting.

He only brings out 1 of his various handguns per range visit. Ive seen a SA 1911, a .357 python, and a .44 magnum. He meticulously sets up his bay with properly placed range bag, cleaning tools, and ammo always in the same arrangement on his table.

Then he will sweep forward any brass within 5 feet of him. Then he sends his target out to the max which i think is 20 - 25 yds, readies his weapon and takes one very slow shot. Everytime Ive bothered to look its within an inch or less of the bullseye.

Then he will dissassemble and clean his gun, atleast the barrel, and closely inspect. After that he will rinse and repeat the entire routine including sweeping anyones brass that has landed near him.

[Tamara]

Don't forget to get the unit patch:
http://i.imgur.com/R0dSt.jpg

http://milspecmonkey.com/store/patches/shuttledoorgunner

zomg I totally want one of those patches! :eek:

[Al T.]

zomg I totally want one of those patches!

Gotta be one or sleep with one.... :cool:

I'm just sayin.........

:D

[fuse]

Im reminded of an older asian man who comes to my range. He's there almost everytime i come doing the same routine. Theres really nothing wrong with what he does, I just find it interesting.

He only brings out 1 of his various handguns per range visit. Ive seen a SA 1911, a .357 python, and a .44 magnum. He meticulously sets up his bay with properly placed range bag, cleaning tools, and ammo always in the same arrangement on his table.

Then he will sweep forward any brass within 5 feet of him. Then he sends his target out to the max which i think is 20 - 25 yds, readies his weapon and takes one very slow shot. Everytime Ive bothered to look its within an inch or less of the bullseye.

Then he will dissassemble and clean his gun, atleast the barrel, and closely inspect. After that he will rinse and repeat the entire routine including sweeping anyones brass that has landed near him.

Didn't know Mr. Miyagi was into guns. http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keisuke_Miyagi

[TCinVA]

Being a space shuttle door gunner is nothing. At worst you encounter some bug-eyed little dude with glowing fingers that can be placated with Reese's Pieces. They ain't exactly doing battle with Decepticons.

Try being the screen door gunner on a nuclear sub sometime. One day I'll have to tell y'all about the time when I had to fight a cracken while one of my arms was trapped in the treads of the sub. They gave me the silver heart and the blue clover for that one.

[Tamara]

Gotta be one or sleep with one.... :cool:

I'm just sayin.........

:D
My former downstairs neighbor and some of his squadron mates were eating lunch at Texas Roadhouse wearing their poopie suits. The waitron noticed MSgt. B's AFSPC & squadron patches...

Waitron (breathily and out of nowhere): "Wow! Do you fly satellites?"

MSgt. B: "....?"

Maj. Y: "Yes, ma'am. Yes, he does."

:D

[DanH]

I was sighting in my Rem 700 one year before deer season at 200 yds and couldn't believe it when someone asked me if I was a sniper (I'm not even close). I mean, really, it's 200 not 500. And I'm lucky to get 2inch groups.
They didn't believe me when I told them I'm an accountant.

[bdcheung]

I was sighting in my Rem 700 one year before deer season at 200 yds and couldn't believe it when someone asked me if I was a sniper (I'm not even close). I mean, really, it's 200 not 500. And I'm lucky to get 2inch groups.
They didn't believe me when I told them I'm an accountant.

Well, I mean, really... what sort of accountant zeroes a sniper rifle one year before deer season?

</grammar snob>

[Byron]

In line with the whole strangers-though-I-was-a-spook stories, I have one from the other side of the table (kind of).

Years back I was at a small, public range with a friend when a third shooter arrived. This is an unattended range in the middle of nowhere, so I get a little nervous when unknowns show up (I've seen some crazy stuff there, including a guy who would just start marching downrange while people were still shooting). This guy seemed like he had his head on straight though: was very presentable, polite, and was observing safety rules. If I had to guess, I would wager he did something in the tech field, but perhaps that's just because I know so many tech guys who are shooters.

At some point, he pulled out a suppressed Glock and started pinging steel at 100y. I was excited (had never fired a suppressed weapon before that day) and politely approached him to strike up a conversation. Everything went fine, and he let me run a mag through the suppressed Glock. We parted ways with smiles and handshakes and that was that.

My friend, for whatever reason, didn't seem interested at all. On the car ride back, I found out why...
"THAT GUY HAD A SILENCER! WHO HAS A SILENCER!?!? AND YOU WERE DUMB ENOUGH TO PUT YOUR PRINTS ON IT! HE'S GONNA KILL SOMEONE WITH THAT, AND THE POLICE ARE GOING TO COME LOOKING FOR YOU!!!!"

My friend was dead serious.

[CMG]

Being a space shuttle door gunner is nothing. At worst you encounter some bug-eyed little dude with glowing fingers that can be placated with Reese's Pieces. They ain't exactly doing battle with Decepticons.

Try being the screen door gunner on a nuclear sub sometime. One day I'll have to tell y'all about the time when I had to fight a cracken while one of my arms was trapped in the treads of the sub. They gave me the silver heart and the blue clover for that one.

You truly have not lived until you have gone inverted in a Blackhawk with a sling load.

[LittleLebowski]

Well, I mean, really... what sort of accountant zeroes a sniper rifle one year before deer season?

</grammar snob>

Cyril Figgus.

[digiadaamore]

this happened to me once or twice too. the one time i remember i was shooting a beretta set up in 357 sig, that was very very loud, so i guess i drew attention anyways.
i was just working on long range shooting with it at first so i guess everyone had been lulled into sleep, when i ripped of an extremely fast mozambique drill with the last three rounds in the mag. when i looked up reloading the gun i felt like i had a captive audience:p

[TCinVA]

I think the best one I've dealt with lately is a dude who, upon hearing a buddy and me discussing gun stuff over some coffee, proceeded to intrude on the conversation and make claims about his military service in EOD. The faint whiff of manure was in the air from the start, but about the time when he was telling us about the explosive ammunition he had stored at his mom's house in New Jersey I thought it was time to inform him that admitting to the theft of controlled items from the military in the presence of law enforcement was probably not the wisest move one could make.

[Kyle Reese]

I think the best one I've dealt with lately is a dude who, upon hearing a buddy and me discussing gun stuff over some coffee, proceeded to intrude on the conversation and make claims about his military service in EOD. The faint whiff of manure was in the air from the start, but about the time when he was telling us about the explosive ammunition he had stored at his mom's house in New Jersey I thought it was time to inform him that admitting to the theft of controlled items from the military in the presence of law enforcement was probably not the wisest move one could make.

People will often talk themselves into a whole mess of trouble. It boggles the mind.

[orionz06]

People will often talk themselves into a whole mess of trouble. It boggles the mind.

In this case I think all they would find back at this guys moms house is his bed, some comics, and dirty clothes.

[ubervic]

One of the funniest threads on here, no doubt! I am continually amazed at how some people behave around firearms/shooters.

I think it just goes to show that many people have only very minimal exposure to firearms, and what they do know comes from movies and TV. Too bad that most gun-handling in TV/movies is lame---I'm pretty sure that's why most newer shooters automatically tea-cup a pistol and wonder why the muzzle flips like crazy when they fire. HA!

[Sparks2112]

I got the LEO discount at Chipotle last night because apparently if you're open carrying a firearm, you're a LEO. I would have thought the gunshop t-shirt would have clued them in, but hey, whatever. I never said I was one, and wasn't asked, so hey, Burrito and a Drink for $3.75 wasn't too bad.

[NickA]

I had a guy tell me all about the sweet full auto AK he supposedly got from some retired LEO type guy who did the conversion.
Me: "That's cool. How long did it take for all the paperwork to go through? "
Him: blank stare
Me: "You do know there's all kinds of ATF hoops to jump through for that stuff? "
Him: blank stare
Never did find out if he was BS'ing from the start or had an illegal weapon, and really don't want to know.

Sent from my PC36100 using Tapatalk 2

[Odin Bravo One]

My only thing remotely close was a few months ago when the 12 year old child of my awesome GF was out at the gongs on the local pistol range pouring 230 grain projectiles onto the steel at 600 rpm. Of course, the sound of the Tommygun brings a few curious folks. One gentleman struck up a conversation about how he would like to have one of those, but he didn't want to have to become an FFL/SOT (my words paraphrasing his lack of proper vocabulary) in order to have an NFA item.

After explaining the process, (which he still didn't get), asked how much my Class III license cost.

Explained it again.

Then he declared that if it weren't for the overwhelming amount of the NFA tax, he would probably buy a Tommygun for himself. "But seriously, who has an extra $200 just lying around to pay a tax on a $170 dollar gun".

[fuse]

Numbers. Not everyone is good with them

[Sparks2112]

My only thing remotely close was a few months ago when the 12 year old child of my awesome GF was out at the gongs on the local pistol range pouring 230 grain projectiles onto the steel at 600 rpm. Of course, the sound of the Tommygun brings a few curious folks. One gentleman struck up a conversation about how he would like to have one of those, but he didn't want to have to become an FFL/SOT (my words paraphrasing his lack of proper vocabulary) in order to have an NFA item.

After explaining the process, (which he still didn't get), asked how much my Class III license cost.

Explained it again.

Then he declared that if it weren't for the overwhelming amount of the NFA tax, he would probably buy a Tommygun for himself. "But seriously, who has an extra $200 just lying around to pay a tax on a $170 dollar gun".

Well in fairness, they cost about $170 in 1927 didn't they? ;-)

[Noleshooter]

My shooting isn't good enough for anyone to mistake me for anything cool, but these stories reminded me of a conversation I had with a buddy of mine a while back.


My friends know I'm into shooting and will occasionally ask me about prices or suggestions for guns. He served in the Marine Corp for 4 years as a Hornet mechanic but other than that isn't really a gun-guy and lived in Maryland.


Buddy: Is $2,000 is a good price for an M16?

Me: Umm, you mean an AR-15 and it depends on a lot of things. Manufacturer?

Buddy: It's an M-16. Trust me, I know M16s.

Me: It's not an M16. If it was it would be north of $10k. AR-15s are essentially semi-auto M16s and $2k is on the high end unless it's a nicer variant.

Buddy: Dude, I qualified expert every year as a Marine, I know what I'm talking about. It's an M16.

Me: ...It's a great price. Enjoy the rifle.



He ended up buying a "Russian sniper rifle" from WWII for $200 instead. *sigh*

[Tamara]

"But seriously, who has an extra $200 just lying around to pay a tax on a $170 dollar gun".

That was kind of fed.gov's plan circa 1934, though, no? ;)

[Odin Bravo One]

Precisely.

But I don't think that was what "dude" was thinking. He didn't understand that the age of the piece did not make it less valuable. Well, there were lots of things "dude" didn't understand. Not sure he wanted to either. He was pretty blissful.

[DanH]

Well, I mean, really... what sort of accountant zeroes a sniper rifle one year before deer season?

</grammar snob>

one who works with numbers not words :p
I lolled

[Tamara]

But I don't think that was what "dude" was thinking. He didn't understand that the age of the piece did not make it less valuable. Well, there were lots of things "dude" didn't understand. Not sure he wanted to either. He was pretty blissful.

Having had to explain to somebody why a little piece of metal about an inch long cost several thousand dollars just because it had a number marked on it, I feel your pain.

[NickA]

Then he declared that if it weren't for the overwhelming amount of the NFA tax, he would probably buy a Tommygun for himself. "But seriously, who has an extra $200 just lying around to pay a tax on a $170 dollar gun".

<cue the gif of Rick from Pawn Stars>
"Authentic Thompson submachine gun? I can go like 100 bucks on that. "

Sent from my PC36100 using Tapatalk 2

[LittleLebowski]

My only thing remotely close was a few months ago when the 12 year old child of my awesome GF was out at the gongs on the local pistol range pouring 230 grain projectiles onto the steel at 600 rpm. Of course, the sound of the Tommygun brings a few curious folks. One gentleman struck up a conversation about how he would like to have one of those, but he didn't want to have to become an FFL/SOT (my words paraphrasing his lack of proper vocabulary) in order to have an NFA item.

After explaining the process, (which he still didn't get), asked how much my Class III license cost.

Explained it again.

Then he declared that if it weren't for the overwhelming amount of the NFA tax, he would probably buy a Tommygun for himself. "But seriously, who has an extra $200 just lying around to pay a tax on a $170 dollar gun".

2 please, thanks.

[Ed L]

I try to put the most time firing guns similar to what I carry. But invariably I wind up falling into the SIMP category by virtue of the number of guns I own and the flux in buying and selling guns from time to time, and the fact that I usually only make it to the range about twice a month.

I don't like to bring more than two handguns to the range at a time. I'm not sure if bringing a Glock 17 and 19, or bringing two Glock 17s or two Glock 19s even counts as two guns.

To me the more guns invariably means the more of a pain in the ass.

Nevetheless, the next time I go shooting I will be likely bringing three guns: A glock 19 which is my normal carry gun, a S&W shield 9mm, which is newly bought which I have never fired, and a Caracal Compact with the shortened Quick-See sights, which I will be shooting to compare to these two guns to decide if I want to sell it. Also, I've been hit with some major canine medical expenses that necessitate selling some guns. I would not have bought the Shield if it weren't for the fact that I had put a 50% deposit down in June before I got hit with the medical expenses.

Even though I like owning different types of handguns, I am trying to simplify by selling some guns that I either don't shoot and don't really care about, or that don't offer some difference or advantage over other guns that I own. I've tagged a W. German Sig P228 into the category of not shooting enough and not liking enough to hang onto.

[ToddG]

"But seriously, who has an extra $200 just lying around to pay a tax on a $170 dollar gun".

I think you're all misunderstanding what this poor guy way saying.

"Who has an extra $200 lying around just to pay tax on a gun that costs me $170 in ammo every day I shoot it." :cool:

[Odin Bravo One]

Well, unfortunately, that poor gun has become a Dog and Pony show. It gets plenty of ammo plugged through it, though rarely from me. However, it is a great tool to teach economics to the 12 year old who thinks ammo is free.

[ToddG]

Well, unfortunately, that poor gun has become a Dog and Pony show. It gets plenty of ammo plugged through it, though rarely from me. However, it is a great tool to teach economics to the 12 year old who thinks ammo is free.

Dude. You're my friend. I hate to see you burdened like this. I'll trade ya'...

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51Fjxa7mJkL._SL500_AA300_.jpg

[_JD_]

These threads kind of make me miss the French Creek State Park in PA...


I don't know if my favorites were the homeies that would come out after the gun show and without putting up a target would just come out, full homie the gun and empty the mag just to see if the Jennings / Hi Point would work and get back in the car, OR the time I saw two guys in matching outfits (blue T-shirts and Khakis) with matching Fobus holsters and matching Glocks trying to do quick draw / mag dumps, one hitting the ground about 5-6' in front of him pretty consistently, and for the the "tactical" prowess these guys were trying t display, they were shooting at Shoot-N-C Turkey Targets that were so shot up you couldn't see the new hits.

[Odin Bravo One]

Dude. You're my friend. I hate to see you burdened like this. I'll trade ya'...

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51Fjxa7mJkL._SL500_AA300_.jpg

Cool.

The book, plus a little cash to round out the difference.

$16,994.05 should about do it.