Minnesota Supreme Court declares your rectum a safe space...

[Old Man Winter]

CliffsNotes:

Crack dealer shoves bag of crack in his ass. Cops take him to hospital and secure not one but two warrants to retrieve bag of crack from suspects ass. Man is strapped down and sedated against his wishes. Bag of crack is retrieved. Man is arrested and convicted of fifth-degree drug possession. Man appeals and makes it to the Minnesota Supreme Court where his conviction is overturned.

The court wrote, “If a coerced invasion of one’s [body] cavity — an area inherently personal and private — while sedated and in front of strangers is not a serious and substantial intrusion of an individual’s dignitary interest in personal privacy and bodily integrity, we cannot fathom what is.”

Had police waited for the man to naturally eliminate the bag of crack from his ass the Minnesota Supreme Court wouldn't have declared our rectum a safe space.

Full court doc:

https://law.justia.com/cases/minnesota/supreme-court/2019/a17-0870.html

[blues]

This case is like an embarrassment of riches for the likes of me...

State vs. Brown

Ass - Crack

The state having the evidence suppressed must've felt like the butt of a cruel joke.

They should've just held him in custody (and under observation) until he eventually had to void his bowels and they would've avoided the whole crappy situation.

They should get training from Customs Inspectors in this arena. They know their shit.





(Apologies in advance. I only took the liberty because it's in the "general" forum.)

[txdpd]

Holy crap this is dumb. That’s a lot of effort for some crack.

Someone shoves drugs you their butt or swallows them....it’s a medical problem. If you can get them out of your custody, do so as quickly as possible. Then you don’t have to deal with a death and custody.

Small time thinking about big time problems.

[Totem Polar]

This case is like an embarrassment of riches for the likes of me...

State vs. Brown


This case will certainly go down in the anals of history. A probing look at privacy.

Glad they ruled quickly; a case like this could have really plugged things up.

[Casual Friday]

This is completely assanine.

[JodyH]

Lordsburg, NM says "hold my Vaseline covered glove.".

[blues]

Holy crap this is dumb. That’s a lot of effort for some crack.

Someone shoves drugs you their butt or swallows them....it’s a medical problem. If you can get them out of your custody, do so as quickly as possible. Then you don’t have to deal with a death and custody.

Small time thinking about big time problems.

It only takes a small lapse for major headaches to ensue. Inspectors catch a guy flying in with coke concealed on body and in luggage. Call out an agent to handle the arrest. Agent handcuffs the guy to a rail in the interview room but leaves him within lunging distance of the evidence while he goes out to call for an assist...

...Guy grabs handfuls of the coke and ingests it while the agent is out of the room. Dies. One of the very few times I've seen a defendant die after being taken into custody at the air or seaport. The Inspectors had that routine nailed down and Jackson Memorial Hospital had a secure ward specifically set up for monitoring (internal) body carriers so no Constitutional issues (so to speak) arose. (Thankfully I never had to be one of the poor souls either monitoring or securing those dirtbags at the hospital.)

ETA: There were guys who died post arrest from burst coke and heroin filled condoms they had swallowed, but that was on them as there was really nothing the hospital could do. X-ray and wait it out if it couldn't be induced.

[andre3k]

I deal with this every single night and it's a headache. The dealers most often either hold in their mouth or their ass. Usually they won't shove it inside of the rectum but they'll keep the baggie between the cheeks for easy access. We'll watch them make the hand to hands and pull it from their waistband during the search.

There are some that can shove it up their ass pretty quick. If we don't have another charge then they win that one and we'll have to catch them the next day. I'm not going to spend hours dealing with a search warrant when I can go one block over and get another case.

Sent from my SM-G965U using Tapatalk

[Kanye Wyoming]

Ass-backwards decision. The suspect gave them an opening. Cheeky bastard.

With that out of the way, I bow in reverence to:


This case will certainly go down in the anals of history.

[45dotACP]

Rectum? Hell it damn near killed him!

Sent from my moto g(6) using Tapatalk

[MistWolf]

Rectum!?! Durn near kilt'um!

I wonder what kind of SPINcter the left is gonna put on this ruling? This could put a taint on the body of evidence...

[BehindBlueI's]

I always thought Nancy Reagan would have been more successful with "that's been up some dude's ass" then "just say no".

[blues]

I always thought Nancy Reagan would have been more successful with "that's been up some dude's ass" then "just say no".

It would've made me look at the jellybeans with a jaundiced eye. ;)

[Baldanders]

Having her read some of Blues' handiwork did it yesterday.


But a whole thread of this sort of thing?













I do have to say, dying from a burst condom full of cocaine in the colon has to be a shitty way to go.

[Duces Tecum]

Finally! Thank heaven Democrats now have a safe place.

[TC215]

I can’t even count the number of times I’ve retrieved crack from a...crack. It’s the most popular place to hide dope. I’ve also had the unfortunate experience of doing an undercover buy where the dealer produced the cocaine directly from his “safe space” and straight into my hand. Ugh.

[TGS]

...the dealer produced the cocaine directly from his “safe space” and straight into my hand. Ugh.

You Appalachian' boys.....

[JodyH]

I’ve also had the unfortunate experience of doing an undercover buy where the dealer produced the cocaine directly from his “safe space” and straight into my hand. Ugh.
Was it his right or left hand?
I ask because in some cultures I think you two are considered to be common law married now.

[hufnagel]

Y'all are setting the bar pretty high for Shittiest Thread of 2020 (or the coming decade.) Pace yourselves or it'll be a crappy year.

[TC215]

Was it his right or left hand?
I ask because in some cultures I think you two are considered to be common law married now.

Ha, I lost it when I read that.

That guy was 6'7", I know where my place would be in our relationship.

[mtnbkr]

That guy was 6'7", I know where my place would be in our relationship.
All up in your safe space? :D

Chris