Humor: SEAL Takes Down Little Girl

[Chance]

Or a sea lion rather. They're effectively the same thing... probably (I don't really "do" animals).


https://youtu.be/SRupvfkOG70

[TR675]

Saw that. People just crack me up.

"Hey, there's a toothy monster from the deep!"

"Let's pet it!"


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[RoyGBiv]

Seal.

[Chance]

Seal.

16803

[TAZ]

Gotta admit, I wouldn't have thought it would come up after the kid. Also wouldn't have been near there either. They do have teeth and if folks had been teasing it with food they might just get pissed. Doesn't seem like the kid was hurt thankfully.

[JohnO]

Lots of people have no understanding of where they are in the food chain and how that varies based on their surroundings. Many other are just plain stupid.

[GuanoLoco]

Gotta admit, I wouldn't have thought it would come up after the kid. Also wouldn't have been near there either. They do have teeth and if folks had been teasing it with food they might just get pissed. Doesn't seem like the kid was hurt thankfully.

>> A male California sea lion weighs on average about 300 kg (660 lb) and is about 8 ft (2.4 m) long ....

Yes, let's mess with 600 lb territorial male wild animal in its native habitat. Whether based in aggression, food driven or simply playful, all acts by this creature could have life changing or even lethal consequences.

Reminds me of the recent episode of the girl 'play boxing' with the kangaroo. Funny until the kangaroo decided to reciprocate.

Hell I've seen a squirrel kick the crap out of a child who, after sharing saltine crackers, decided that the last cracker should be eaten by the child. The squirrel got the last word in on that poor decision.

Darwin at work here folks, the only thing to see is that which is entirely predictable.

[Reload8]

Looked pretty scary to me. Now she's going to have an irrational fear of them growing up :(

[Sherman A. House DDS]

I grew up on an island around seals and sea lions. They are not to be trifled with. If you find one on the dock, take another route, or wait. They're mean bastards.

Islanders operate on, "island time," because Mother Nature (either wildlife, weather, or downed trees) have a way of mucking up your well made plans.


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[theJanitor]

Good on that guy for getting in quick.

I live on an island, and I hardly go in the water. We had about ten shark attacks in 2016. On land, I'm pretty high up on the food chain. In the water, I'm probably lower than a sardine.

[BobLoblaw]

https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20170522/eec31d8767fca3aa003235c305bee1e8.jpg

[Chance]

>> A male California sea lion weighs on average about 300 kg (660 lb) and is about 8 ft (2.4 m) long ....

Holy cow, I didn't realize they were that big. I thought she looked like a rag doll, but I didn't realize the size disparity was that large.

[GuanoLoco]

With such a cute wild creature, what could go wrong?

16805

[MistWolf]

A wild animal is exactly that- a wild animal, no matter what Disney tells us. That little girl is lucky the seal didn't try dragging her deep

[Sensei]

Good on that guy for getting in quick.

I live on an island, and I hardly go in the water. We had about ten shark attacks in 2016. On land, I'm pretty high up on the food chain. In the water, I'm probably lower than a sardine.

Yeah, it would have taken me 30 seconds to remove my gun, ammo, cell phone, Johnston & Murphy shoes, wallet, and stretched my hamstrings. That seal and kid would have probably been carried away by the circling white shark by the time I was ready to jump in...;)

[GuanoLoco]

The average PF member would have immediately been dragged to the bottom by sheer EDC kit weight alone.

[Chance]

I kind of want maritime firing pin cups now, just in case I end up ECQCing with a sea lion.

[Totem Polar]

Once again, MUC (managing unknown carnivora).

[Joe in PNG]

I would think that the "lion" in the name "seaLION" would be kind of a clue about the nature of the critter.
And yeah, once a human is in open water, their position on the food chain drops a bit.

[Duelist]

Dude that went in after her was fast! And left his sunglasses in the water.

[Clusterfrack]

Dude that went in after her was fast! And left his sunglasses in the water.

Yup. Hero points for that dude for sure.

A while back I was surfing in Santa Cruz and a guy next to me got attacked by a harbor seal. Bit him mid-body, thrashed him, and ripped his wetsuit. They are bigger up close...

[LOKNLOD]

Looked pretty scary to me. Now she's going to have an irrational fear of them growing up :(

I'd say any fears she has from this point forward are most certainly highly rational.

[Lomshek]

Saw that. People just crack me up.

"Hey, there's a toothy monster from the deep!"

"Let's pet it!"


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Damn nature you scary! LOL

At least dad took care of business ASAFP! Took about 2 seconds for him to hit the water and get her out.

[Chance]

At least dad took care of business ASAFP! Took about 2 seconds for him to hit the water and get her out.

I don't think that was her dad. They walked off in different directions afterwards. I think that was just a random guy.

[Maple Syrup Actual]

That's just down the road from me. I buy fish there, off the boats, and wander around on the docks sometimes. Might be able to figure out which boat that is, if I watched it a few times.

A) do not fuck with sea lions. Even seals. My uncle was rinsing off fish blood from his hands at a dock not far from there, and a simple harbour seal mistook his hands for a fish, thrashing in the water. Drove himself to the hospital for dozens of stitches after its raked teeth dragged back into the ocean and he insisted on retaining his hands. Extensive antibiotics to counter bone infections after his carpals got slathered in seal saliva.

B) yeah, guessing that wasn't her dad, on the basis of the "let's just leave" reaction of the mother. Seen that kind of thing a lot around here (not specifically in reference to sea lions).

C) a sea lion weighs as much as a large tiger. Factor that into your decision making, if possible.

D) pretty good chance the sea lion had never seen prey in the water as large as a human child. They eat a lot of salmon, but rarely more than 20 lbs I wouldn't think. A thrashing fifty pound kid was probably a serious WTF for it.

E) that said, do not fuck with sea lions. If only for the fact that sea lions are food for killer whales, which don't just kill you, they basically torture you to death.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7WGIH35JBE

Okay, that's just an example of them kicking a seal to death. But it was filmed right where I grew up, literally. I used to fish that spot in a 12' aluminum skiff with my dad. But seriously, they're jerks.

[Drang]

I'm still waiting for the humor.

[Chance]

I'm still waiting for the humor.

Wild animal attack w/o injury = funny.

I didn't say I was a good person.

[GuanoLoco]

Wild animal attack w/o injury = funny.

I didn't say I was a good person.

Most of America having few if any remaining survival instincts - sad but funny in a twisted way.

[Maple Syrup Actual]

This picture was taken there the next day.

https://i.cbc.ca/1.4126884.1495487358!/fileImage/httpImage/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/16x9_780/steveston-sea-lion.jpg

Locally I'm hearing a lot of people advocating for a cull but I think that might be a bit extreme. A combination of education and readily available birth control seems sufficient to me.

[Cheap Shot]

. A combination of education and readily available birth control seems sufficient to me.

People or seals?

[Maple Syrup Actual]

A seal cull hadn't even occurred to me.

[Cypher]

This picture was taken there the next day.

https://i.cbc.ca/1.4126884.1495487358!/fileImage/httpImage/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/16x9_780/steveston-sea-lion.jpg

Locally I'm hearing a lot of people advocating for a cull but I think that might be a bit extreme. A combination of education and readily available birth control seems sufficient to me.

And I bet that white sign says "Don't Feed The Seals"

[Maple Syrup Actual]

It does, but it's in English, making it basically pointless there.

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[Robinson]

People can be freaking stupid. I'll never forget driving through Yellowstone way back when, seeing people alongside the road feeding bears those old Astronaut Stick things they used to make. That means up close and personal. Right next to the "Do Not Feed The Bears, Dumbass!" sign.

Shortly before I was there, a bear had killed a little girl whose mother had smeared jelly on the child's face so she could get a picture of a bear licking it off. At least that's what we heard, and it wouldn't surprise me if true. :mad::mad::mad:

On that same trip a mother bear and her cubs ransacked our campground in the middle of the night. We were woken up by loud breathing circling the camper, then trash cans and coolers started to be flung about. Our metal cooler had a big dent in the side of it, but hadn't been opened.

[GuanoLoco]

I was in Yellowstone and a small black bear was moving parallel to our trail back to the large parking lot. I was pulling out just as an increasingly dense crowd of tourists with cameras had almost totally encircled the bear in the parking lot. I figured even incidental contact with a spooked bear plowing through the crowd would mean broken bones or worse.

Later I saw what I think was a Japanese tourist with a camera, lying down on the side of the road, almost completely underneath an American Bison - taking pictures. His family was nearby. These things aren't exactly known for their pleasant dispositions and can easily weigh 1000-1500 lbs or more. I had no words.

It is surprising more people aren't injured or killed by wildlife and I don't have a lick of sympathy for such idiots.

[TAZ]

I was in Yellowstone and a small black bear was moving parallel to our trail back to the large parking lot. I was pulling out just as an increasingly dense crowd of tourists with cameras had almost totally encircled the bear in the parking lot. I figured even incidental contact with a spooked bear plowing through the crowd would mean broken bones or worse.

Later I saw what I think was a Japanese tourist with a camera, lying down on the side of the road, almost completely underneath an American Bison - taking pictures. His family was nearby. These things aren't exactly known for their pleasant dispositions and can easily weigh 1000-1500 lbs or more. I had no words.

It is surprising more people aren't injured or killed by wildlife and I don't have a lick of sympathy for such idiots.

Yellowstone must be an idiot magnet. Was there 2 years ago and saw people trying to get close to bison and Elk. Not small Elk, but ginormous Elk. Even if these beautiful animals don't mean to hurt you just a simple bump means broken bones. Wish I was videoing when the Elk got bored or spooked and decided to run off and hook up with its friends. The frenzy of stupid trying to get out of the way was funny. Thankfully no injuries to either the animal or the people. On our last day someone got whacked by a bison.

[Chance]

I'll never forget driving through Yellowstone way back when, seeing people alongside the road feeding bears those old Astronaut Stick things they used to make. That means up close and personal. Right next to the "Do Not Feed The Bears, Dumbass!" sign.


I was in Yellowstone and a small black bear was moving parallel to our trail back to the large parking lot. I was pulling out just as an increasingly dense crowd of tourists with cameras had almost totally encircled the bear in the parking lot.

....

Later I saw what I think was a Japanese tourist with a camera, lying down on the side of the road, almost completely underneath an American Bison - taking pictures. His family was nearby. These things aren't exactly known for their pleasant dispositions and can easily weigh 1000-1500 lbs or more. I had no words.


Yellowstone must be an idiot magnet.

Apparently so. I was there as a kid, and a drunk tourist decided to pet a full grown bison that had wandered into the parking lot. My parents shielded me from most of the action, but I do remember the guy flinging himself against the wall of the cafe as a last resort. He was fine, although he didn't deserve to be.

[nate89]

Some of the dumbest people I have ever seen have been in Yellowstone. A co-worker of mine is up there at least a month or two out of the year with spotting scopes and cameras observing the wildlife and has way more stories than I do. The fact that the park rangers haven't just started shooting people who directly disregard commands is amazing. Having a camera there sure seems to give some people a sever case of the stupid.

[BehindBlueI's]

I don't think that was her dad. They walked off in different directions afterwards. I think that was just a random guy.

I think it probably was her dad. Note she screams something a few times and he then answers. From the tone, I suspect the little girl realized he was in the water and was calling to make sure he was also ok as Mom shepherded her to 'safety'.

[Drang]

A seal cull hadn't even occurred to me.

A stupid human cull would probably garner less outrage.

[Maple Syrup Actual]

suits me

[Robinson]

Some of the dumbest people I have ever seen have been in Yellowstone.

Now that I think about it, we did almost get trampled to death by a small herd of horses...

[Maple Syrup Actual]

https://static.wixstatic.com/media/bc9899_a70d3e8611124f17b7a06d3529ed41eb.png/v1/fill/w_428,h_575,al_c,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/bc9899_a70d3e8611124f17b7a06d3529ed41eb.png

Ordered.

[Cypher]

Yellowstone must be an idiot magnet. Was there 2 years ago and saw people trying to get close to bison and Elk. Not small Elk, but ginormous Elk. Even if these beautiful animals don't mean to hurt you just a simple bump means broken bones. Wish I was videoing when the Elk got bored or spooked and decided to run off and hook up with its friends. The frenzy of stupid trying to get out of the way was funny. Thankfully no injuries to either the animal or the people. On our last day someone got whacked by a bison.

I read this Yellowstone story in a book called Mark Of The Grizzly. According to the park employee who told the story a crowd of tourists had stopped on a road to take pictures of a female grizzly and her young. A motorist got out of his car, walked across the field and touched the bear on the ass. The employee ran across the field and all but dragged him back away from the bear. No one has any idea why the guy is still alive.

[Chance]

A sort-of-but-not-completely related video that's actually pretty interesting. Fascinating to see how a predator's instincts just kick in. And it's hilarious to see how they react when caught.


https://youtu.be/bZgklu52Rus

And another of a lioness getting her very first kill that first saw on WeaponsMan (http://weaponsman.com/?p=19468), may he rest in peace.


https://youtu.be/thNwNvvi48M

Bottom line: cats, and their aquatic counterparts, are just sort of assholes in general.

Pretty humbling to know that without our fancy sharpened sticks, we'd be dinner to a lot of animals.

[GuanoLoco]

There is a reason why masks like this are EDC in some parts of the world - even heard of them being used for our native mountain lions.

16858

[theJanitor]

remember this? The video description is not wholly accurate.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MIkY36LN0A

[Cypher]

I read this Yellowstone story in a book called Mark Of The Grizzly. According to the park employee who told the story a crowd of tourists had stopped on a road to take pictures of a female grizzly and her young. A motorist got out of his car, walked across the field and touched the bear on the ass. The employee ran across the field and all but dragged him back away from the bear. No one has any idea why the guy is still alive.

Wanted to add a link for the book


https://books.google.com/books/about/Mark_of_the_Grizzly.html?id=SZxUnwEACAAJ&hl=en

[modrecoil]

I also had an immediate Yellowstone flashback. Highest density of idiotic behavior out of the 30+ national parks I've visited.

https://www.facebook.com/YellowstoneIdiots/

Also, why is this stupid fuck (dad, presumably) laughing after his kid is chased by a 1,200 lb bison? I can't even.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7VghMbLiMA

[Robinson]

Also, why is this stupid fuck (dad, presumably) laughing after his kid is chased by a 1,200 lb bison? I can't even.

Why? Because he literally, even after seeing it happen, has no idea. It's like people think these animals are animatronics at an amusement park.

[Joe in PNG]

Why? Because he literally, even after seeing it happen, has no idea. It's like people think these animals are animatronics at an amusement park.

Or the tame animals found at a petting zoo.