Ell. Oh. Ell.
If you ever see me refer to myself as a "warrior" or "guardian", somebody's hacked my account. And I sure as hell ain't got no messiah complex.
If I'm in aisle twelve at Meijer's and I hear AK fire pop off up by the front doors, I'm headin' out the bitch door in the back. I'm there for diet soda and frozen pizzas, not to save the world with my six-shot snubbie.